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Whether it’s through horror stories from your friends or movies such as Monster In Law, Crazy Rich Asians and Meet The Parents, mothers-in-law have a bad reputation, especially to the women married to their sons. And apparently, they’re even worse when you live under the same roof as them!
But… is that really true?
It’s possible that your mother-in-law and you just don’t see eye to eye because you just have different expectations of each other. In the end, what you have in common is the love you have for your partner/her child.
To put things into better perspective, we talked to seven Malaysian women who were willing to share stories about their mother-in-law:
(Editor’s note: All of the names have been changed for the sake of privacy)
#1 Dina, 30
“There were moments when my mother-in-law accidentally offended me… like when she says things like, “Why do you look pale and unhealthy?”. She also nags me not to get snacks or carbonated drinks and replace them with healthier foods.
Before this I thought she would be a bit more conservative because she comes from a traditional background. But after getting to know her better I found out that she thinks women shouldn’t be serving their husband all the time.
She’s also really worldly, even though she’s a housewife.”
#2 Lisa, 62
"My relationship with my mother-in-law is a love-hate one. She showed me 'face' on my wedding day because I 'took' her eldest son away. And I don't think she liked me very much too... but she really loved my daughter and took great care of her while we're at work.
So for that, I'll have to give her some credit."
#3 Mary, 44
“Honestly, my mother-in-law and I never got along, and it was worse when we lived together. We just have different lifestyles lah. Everything I do is wrong. She didn’t even like the fresh fruits I picked!
The worst was when she picked up my daughter and took her to the mall without informing me. Of course I panicked! It doesn’t help that my husband used to side with her, and she dotes on him because you know how mothers are with their only son.
Anyway, she moved out a few months ago to live with my sister in law, and things are more peaceful at home. We’re both learning to draw boundaries and can get along better now.”
After listening to all these stories, it got us thinking just how similar a woman’s relationship with her MIL is to a rollercoaster ride! There are ups and downs—it’s sometimes good and sometimes bad. But like all relationships, it takes effort to make it better.
Need a little help?
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